It’s frustrating isn’t it, when you give advice that you know will really help people and then they just nod politely and walk away and either do completely the opposite or do nothing?
You spend your time and energy with them, give them the best advice you can, utilising all of your knowledge and experience and they don’t act on it.
Come on, be honest though, how many time have you done the same thing? How many times have you listened to someone’s advice and, even though you know it makes logical sense, something stops you from actually implementing it?
The thing is we all do it.
Usually because there is some kind of block that stops us taking on the advice and acting on it.
This may be an internal block such as a belief that we can’t do it (this type of belief is often not based on logic and there may be an underlying belief about our self that stops us letting go of it).
There may be an underlying emotion attached such as fear, overwhelm, anxiousness or trepidation.
We may simply be too busy, or it just seems like too much effort.
We may not actually, deep down, want to solve the problem.
We may be unclear on exactly what we want to achieve or why.
We might not really connect with the overall outcome or acting on the advice just doesn’t seem right for us and clashes with our values or who we see ourselves as.
The person giving the advice may be using too many words or not the right words and we just feel like they are not on the same wavelength as us.
The thing is, we all know that the advice we are most likely to act on is the advice we give ourselves isn’t it?
And yet we still find it really hard to resist giving advice.
There is another way though.
Another way that saves you a lot of energy and frustration and that’s simply facilitating people to come to their own solutions.
By adopting a coaching approach, you can help them solve their own problems in a way that they can then take ownership of. At the same time, by asking skillful and powerful coaching questions you can also help them loosen and even get rid of the blocks that have stopped them in the past.
I am passionate about NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) and find the questioning techniques so powerful and effective and love being surprised by how people suddenly find that they can get rid of their negative inner voice and give themselves the right kind of advice that enables them to achieve and take ownership.
I am also a great advocate of Clean Language. This allows me to use some simple, yet impactful, questions that completely respects where the other person is and facilitates them to not only find their own solutions but also believe in them and take ownership of them.
If this appeals to you and you want to dip your toe into learning more, I would love to see you at our one-day content packed day on Saturday 23rd February in Waterloo, London.
To book your £29 ticket just visit: